Hello?

Most kids love to share their wealth of knowledge with confidence and pride. When my younger son was 2 ½ we were finger-painting at the table while our large yellow lab was under the table occasionally running into the boys and the table. B looked and asked, “Why is Bear doing that?” I explained, “She just wants to play with you.” He quickly responds “MOM, Bear can’t play, she doesn’t have any arms” in the way only a 2-year-old can proclaim, as though they are a bit surprised you got this far in life clearly lacking basic knowledge. H on the other hand showed his knowledge in less direct ways. To add to this guessing game, he often pretended he couldn’t do things, especially if a girl or favorite adult was around to help. I remember picking H and B up from daycare and seeing all of the kids outside playing with bubbles. I spot H with the daycare provider as she blew bubbles for him. I walked over and said “H, how come you aren’t blowing bubbles?” The daycare provider said he handed her the bubbles to do it for him. She was unaware he could do it himself. Typically when this happened, H would slowly turn his head trying to hide the demure Mona Lisa smile on his face as you realized you were getting played.

 

When my younger son had enough money to purchase his first cell phone, we decided that it would be helpful is H also learned how to use a phone especially as he gained more independence. My main concern was the 200 text limit each month for his younger brother (yes, this was a few years ago). I was at work when I received an email from our mobile provider stating that we owed more than $300 that month in internet usage. Checking the phones online I noticed H’s phone was on the web daily. I was both aghast and proud of his new skill. Knowing what he could have stumbled across on the web we were grateful it was only weather however, not grateful enough to assume the extra payment. I explained to the mobile provider that he was a special needs guy interested in the daily weather and we were unaware that he was able to navigate onto the web each day. They agreed to waive the fee and I signed up for $10 a month to provide him his weather updates. When we switched to smartphones, our second bill showed an additional $60 that month in app purchases again, tied to his number. Apps like NFL workout, which we were confident he wasn’t even using. The mobile provider added a purchase block on his phone yet the next month the charges were still there. The provider insisted that he had purchases blocked but after some investigating it was discovered he didn’t purchase apps, he apparently bought subscriptions every month.

 

Now that H is living away from home, we are working on FaceTime, probably more for me than for him. We have progressed from looking down his ear canal to staring at his ceiling with just the very top of his head at the bottom of the screen. We try to direct him. “Can you move the phone up a bit, a little more, can we see your face, Whoa!, too close, we can only see your nose, can you back it up just a little, where did you go, you know what, never mind, it’s fine”. I can see parts of him and even if it is only a close up of one eye, it gives me a little peace of mind.